the cure for loneliness

I'm not good at letting people go. In fact, I'm pretty terrible at it. I can't even begin to explain, or even understand really, the pain I put myself through trying to hold onto people. I know I should let them go, put the past where it's meant to be, and move on. Be happy. Be happy alone.

I get so easily attached to people, and usually my relationships get really intense. I don't know why this is, and as hard as it might be in the end, I can't say I truly regret it. At all. I feel like this is a gift. I feel like I have shared the most beautiful moments in time with people who I have loved for years, for months, for weeks, for days, or maybe, merely in a moment.

Someone said to me the other day they didn't believe in love happening in a matter of months. I used to think that too...but what I've come to believe, or at least chosen to believe, is that love doesn't operate that way...and it comes in all forms. Long lasting, fleeting, whatever. Love is love. I think a person can walk into your life on the right day, in the right place, at the right time and you can fall in love with them a little bit right there. I really really believe that, because I've seen it too many times to not. Do I believe in one person for everyone? No. Maybe that's why I have a hard time letting go of people.

I think my views on this have all changed very recently actually. Oct. 9, 2011 if you want to be exact. I fell in love on a rock in a field with a bearded stranger. I'm not kidding. I truly fell in love in the span of an hour and a half. Maybe not forever love, but if anyone ever tries to tell my that in that moment I didn't love this scruffy poet, I will argue until I'm blue in the face.

Here I am, a hopeless romantic after all this time, who would have thought.

Maybe there isn't a point to this post other than thatI'm lonely and I once heard that writing letters is the cure for loneliness (reading is good too, so is music, so are movies...) so whoever, if ever, anyone reads this, forgive my ramblings. I'm a lonely girl with leftover love and nowhere to put it.